Im getting over you.. most of the time..

Im getting over you.. most of the time..

This song is just always on my mind..

Cant get it off..

And since no one knows my blog url.. so fuck it..

Is it still wrong to think bout how are you.. are you doing fine.. and are you trying to get over me too?.. Coz its fair to nobody..

As I browse through the photos... Really cant help but to ..

Friends that I had are no longer mine when I have suffered the most torturous pain ..losing you..

I really hate myself for acting like everything is fine initially when we broke up...

Everybody just treat me as heartless freak.. but I know that I ain't..

I dunno who else does.. but I know.. that I am not.. I was never..

Can I say that I've regretted?.. haha.. it would be a joke.. and how fair is this to the woman I love now?..

I know I'm the one who's harsh and heartless and gave up on us.. and even moved on to another relationship thinking that I've forgotten.. hurt you too deeply..

But I really can't hurt another girl..

Its not that I dun love Sy.. I really do.. alot.. but... perhaps I really haven get over Jx..

Can I say I love both?.. Ha.. absurd.. totally absurd..

But I get equally nervous or panic when they both have problems..

That's the feeling I have now.. and its driving me crazy..

I know I'm wrong.. but I can't control it.. I really put in a lot of commitment in every single relationship..and hope I could be cherished too.. even with Candice when she changed(in my point of view) and hurt me so deeply..

Seriously, if a question were to be asked whether I would save Jx or Sy if they are in danger at the same time..

I would say both.. or I don't know..

but.. this is just .. absurd.. I mean who am I to hurt two wonderful girls who truly loves me.. and what rights do I have to love them?...

Both of them do not know how much I truly love and care for them.. becoz I never really told them..

Some say .. love doesn't mean possession .. love does'nt mean that two have to be together to have it..

I agree totally..

Becoz I just wish Jx can get over me fast and be as happy as before..

But I dun think thats possible for now.. Coz I've really hurt her too deep..

Time.. please heal her.. for you will heal me too..

And now...

I'm hated by the mass.. hated by the ppl..hated by my friends thinking that I'm heartless..

Sometimes I look into the mirror.. I try to say that I'm heartless.. and I can be a jerk..

But I can't.. I can't be the Jerk that I tried to be..

Every single bits of memory has now become a prick.. a chocolate in my heart.. followed by a spear.. followed by some sweets.. a gun shot.. followed by a tiramisu..with an ending of a drop of lime which consist of all the sour things in this world.. ..

Numb..